While I beat some daunting odds in mid-July of 2015, I lost much of my life when my literal life was being rescued. So much of my life was lost on that day
I always had a feeling that I would die young; but this isn’t the afterlife I was expecting.
I survived a massive hemmoragic stroke in 2015. The use of the word survived intentionally very intentional, yet the life that survived the 1/10 odds of my particular type of brain injury. Brain injuries are like snowflakes, as no two are alike. It wasn’t too long ago that recovery from a stroke included an assessment of deficits and capabilities to design a way for the survivor to operate with full-time care or in a skilled nursing facility or constant attention by family or caregivers. Zto me that is a bridge too far. In these 7 years, I’ve definitely felt both scenarios, hard-core. While I continue to be determined to regain strength and mobility, it can be assumed that, no matter how long, I will never have a normal life unlike most of my peers.
Zsince I woke up after a month-long “nap” I have seen so much of what my could’ve or would’ve been if not wrestled away from me.
Honestly It’s hard for me not to think that I lost my life that day, and every day since waking up from it, I’ve been looking for it, or ways that I can find ways to return to that life in even small ways. If I am to re-start my life under these new circumstances, what can be expected. I feel like there’s a life for me out there, but I still haben’t found it. I’ve been challenged to put together an action plan for whatever my next step is. For the first few years post-stroke, I was in situations where there were clear goals and achievements to reach that would progress me to a next step. Other than gaining continuous independence, I don’t have any cclear guidance or idea for what’s next for me. For all intents & purposes I lost my life (as it was) in July of 2015, and I still haven’t found what it is that I’m looking for, but I Am looking for, but I have hope I will.Companion Playlist